Here's an example of some of the tweets I particularly liked.
AAA WHEN DID I SUDDENLY GET THE REPUTATION OF BEING PORTABLE gah put me down PUT ME DOWN PUT ME DOWN PUT ME DOWN flump sheesh come on guy
I'LL BE TAKING MY DINNER UNDER THE DINING ROOM TABLE CANOPY THIS EVENING hey come back here oh well usual eating place it is trot trot
JUST CONSIDER THIS TWITCHING TAIL A DO NOT DISTURB SIGN thanks
SO WHAT EXACTLY IS INSIDE THIS CORD must gnaw to determine what's inside GNAW GNAW GNAW REVEAL YOUR SECRETS CORD other than you're chewy
SAD TO SAY I AM NOT CURRENTLY A TWITTER VERIFIED ACCOUNT but watch this nobody knocks over the one expensive thing like I can SEE IT'S ME
hey fatty how ya doing SURE COULD USE SOME FOOD AND HERE I AM RUBBING AGAINST YOUR FACE AND HEY FOOD AND SO FOOD AND oh you're awake FOOD
spending the day at key information gathering location under coffee table AM HAPPY TO REPORT THERE ARE FEET AND LOTS OF THEM
FLAT CAT IN CENTER OF ROOM absolutely no reason SOCKS PEROGATIVE
GAHHHHHHH no matter how long I stare at that rabbit it stares back MOVING HEAD no difference HOW DOES IT DO IT what do you mean it's stone
flat cat on stairs NONE SHALL PASS woah you walked right over me had no idea that was even possible OH WELL zzzzzzzzz
THIS DOOR IS A PARADOX WRAPPED IN AN ENIGMA TRAPPED IN A RIDDLE ok fine it is merely closed STILL RATHER CONFOUNDING
PANTS STATUS: FUZZY TRY AGAIN LATER ha ha will be even more fuzzy then SHED SHED SHED ROLL ROLL ROLL
There's something called the Socks Army that APPARENTLY does some good stuff, but I haven't cared enough to find out more about it. I just think Socks is funny.
And no, in case you were wondering, Orkid will not be getting her own Twitter account nor will she be allowed to exchange emails with any other kitties who would have the ability to teach her how to open doors and cabinets and such.